I remember when I first took my first flight ever. I was 17 or 19 years old and I went to Los Angeles for Thanksgiving. And the airport security wasn’t that bad. People were actually able to wait with or for you at the gate. Then over the years that was little perk and many others were taken away. You had to say goodbye or hello to your loved ones before the security screening. You had to take off your shoes to go through the metal detector. No more tweezing your eyebrows or giving yourself a manicure on the airplane because a tweezer or cuticle scissors have been considered dangerous weapons. Now you can’t even take water through the security screening and there’s where I have a problem.
On the way over from Australia to the US, I let the security people know I have sterilized bottled water for my baby’s formula. They had a look at the water and they said that’s fine. Cool. Then the flight from Los Angeles to Newark was a different story. Again I let the security person that checked the IDs know that I have water for the baby. He said it’s no problem. Then my bags went through the machine. Another security person was called over I guess to let her know about what was in my bag. Then the conversation went as follows:
Security: Is this your bag?
Security (voice raised): What do you have in your bag?
Me: Water but I asked–
Security (interrupting me and raising her voice even more): You were supposed to get rid of the water before coming through security. Why didn’t you?
Me: Because —
Security (yelling): You are NOT allowed to have water. Why do you have this water in your bag?
Me (now I have my voice raised): If you stop interrupting me and let me explain you would that I had advised that security man over there about the water that I need for the baby’s formula and he said that it was fine since it was for the baby’s formula.
Security (clearly pissed): What baby???
Me (pointing to my baby who was in the Moby Wrap): This baby.
Security (sounding sweet now): Oh. I thought you were pregnant. I didn’t know you had a baby. Come over here and I’ll have to check the water to make sure it’s ok.
Once again in Los Angeles for the flight back to Australia, the security agent had a stick up his ass. Since I had run out of the baby’s formula I had to buy some while in NJ so I figured I’ll bypass the whole water thing and get him a ready to feed one in those little bottles. I figured I might as well let him know that I do have ready to feed baby formula in my bag. He tells me to take them out. Fine. Then he asks why do I have so many. I had about 6 eight oz bottles (240 mil). I tell him I am going to Australia. It is a 14 hour flight, not to mention any delays that might occur. He rolls his eyes at me. I’m seriously pissed. He has to take the formula away to check them. Fine as long as he doesn’t open them because then the formula would need to be thrown out. He rolls his eyes again. I’m about to walk through the metal detector with CJ who had finally fallen asleep once I had swaddled him. He then tells me that I have to take the blanket off the baby to put it through the machine. My words: “You’re fucking kidding me. He’s asleep and you want me to wake him. You obviously don’t have kids. It’s a thin receiving blanket. There’s nothing hidden besides we are going through the metal detector. If there’s something there the detector will pick it up.” He didn’t care. So I had to unwrap the baby and of course he woke up. At that moment I decided I’m not traveling again until the boys are much older.
Next post: luggage
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